Salvage the First Bad Man, Yes Please!

HELLO READERS!

This is going to be a hodge podge.

I said that in a very strange voice, but you can't hear me.


In the month of March, I read three books:

Salvage The Bones by Jesmyn Ward
The First Bad Man by Miranda July
Yes Please by Amy Poehler.

WE HAVE SO MUCH TO TALK ABOUT!

I mean, not really. None of these books were THE ONE.

Let's start with Yes Please.

Amy Poehler is a very polite, very funny woman. I like that she stands up for women and does a ton of shit to better the plight of the woman. Her book was fine. I don't care much for comedy books, so I don't know what they're really supposed to offer. I found her very heartwarming and kind. She seemed smart and like a person I'd want to be friends with. I assume that this is the point of a memoir. HOWEVER, I thought all of these things about her before I read the book. I did learn she's from Boston and went to Boston College and cheers for stupid ass teams like the Red Sox. This makes me like her less.

Basically, this book did nothing for me. She told some funny or heartwarming stories, but I would have felt the same way about her as I did before I read the book. (Actually, I would have liked her more because FUCK BOSTON!) A for effort Amy. And thank you, Jerrsica, for lending me the book! I did enjoy reading it. It was a nice book to read after failing miserably at Ulysses. (Don't even get me started!!)

So for the drunk scale, I'd say no and no. This is a fine book, but you don't need to read it.



Let's move on to the next borrowed book! The First Bad Man!

My super cool friend from work lent this to me. Leant? Lent? How do you spell this?

It's good. It's very captivating. I think I read it in like, three days.

I had issues with the book though. The main character is this super passive woman. Now, I feel like I can be pretty passive to a fault, but this lady. Oh man. I didn't understand anything that happened to her! She just kind of went with the flow to a point where, half of the things that happened, I didn't understand why. Like even a normal passive person would not just go along with this stuff. And I didn't understand the point of it! Sometimes, things happen in a novel where I don't necessarily agree with them, but I can see why the author made the decision. Most of the decisions in this book I just didn't understand the point of. I feel like mostly everything was weird for weird's sake. That's okay, I think Miranda July's writing makes up for this. And typically, there's a super sad scene that kind of justifies everything that happens. Like I kind of disliked everything in this book until the very end. The last two pages made everything okay and I maybe even cried a little bit and loved it. I'm not a monster.

So yes, I've totally talked about this book while drunk. The night I finished it, I was out telling my whole party what happened. They were totally not as interested as I was, but I don't care. I liked this book for it's weirdness and I had to tell everyone I knew.

Would I recommend this book while drunk? Seeing as I haven't already, I'll say no. Not because I didn't like it, but because I don't think it's a book for everyone. And the people I get drunk with would not care for this book. I think if I got drunk near a stranger, I would recommend this book though!


Last book we need to discuss is Salvage The Bones.

This is another book that I read in a matter of days. It's fantastic. It's definitely one of the better books I read this year.

It follows a poor family in Mississippi in the days leading up to Hurricane Katrina. Most of the characters are very young and trying to make their way. The story is told through the eyes of Esch.

Her family has been through a lot, her mother died when she was young and she's had to keep an eye on her family of many men. While her father is a drunk, her brothers are constantly getting into trouble, Esch finds out she's pregnant. The father is one of her brothers friends who seems like A REAL FUCKIN DIRT BAG. Esch is madly in love though and there's a lot of drama that follows this. And it breaks my heart because he's the worst. I mean, most people can't walk away from the worst when he's the love of your life, but my god. As an outsider, I wanted to fucking break this guy's face.

There's also a lot of hurricane drama, which is interesting to hear from this point of view. Basically no one but the alcoholic father thought anything was going to happen, and they all basically ignored the warnings.

There's also a side story about the one brother's dog and dog fights and puppies. Basically there are a ton of layers to this novel and they're all as heartbreaking as the next.

Jesmyn Ward's writing is superb and crazy sad. I felt like crying while reading most of this book. The narrator is so tragic and lovable, it's hard to put into words. This book is definitely worth reading.

So yeah, I'd talk about this book while drunk. Actually, after only reading 50 pages, I had a whole conversation about Parvo at the bar one night. I think we've got that drunk convo covered here.

Yes, I'd recommend it drunk, or sober. It's a great book with superb writing that deserves a place on many a book shelf.

LOOK AT THIS AMERICA, FOUR REVIEWS IN ONE NIGHT. PHEW!!!! NOW I CAN GO DRINK IN PALM SPRINGS WITHOUT ALL OF THIS HANGING OVER MY HEAD. HAPPY WEEKEND!!!

Salad Love?????

Hello friends,

I know that it's been so long since I drunk book reported you. And I'm sorry! I've been mildly drunk or SUPER drunk recently. But never in the place to talk about the 4 books that I've read - UNTIL NOW.

Let's talk about the latest super awesome book from Blogging For Books, Salad Love by David Bez.

Let's start with the title. This title is fucking terrible. I'm sorry, but SALAD LOVE??? What, do you want,  your ass kicked?? Who even likes salads? NO ONE.

With that said, there's some pretty good recipes in here. I think I've made three recipes from this book so far. One is fucking amazing. I think about it all the time, AND THIS IS A SALAD WE'RE TALKING ABOUT.

Things that I like about this book:

1. There is a photo with every recipe.

2. There are a lot of recipes.

3. Every recipe has an alternative. "Oh, you don't eat meat? Here's a way to make this salad vegetarian friendly. Or fish friendly. I don't know your life."

I know I started this book report guns blazing, but I actually am crazy about this book. I plan to make every dinner for the rest of my life from this book. (Just kidding. That's a lofty goal.)

So let's talk about the three recipes I made.

The first was a pretty basic salad. (A basic salad for a basic bitch.) It had salad bits, fruit like peaches and blueberries, mint, walnuts and cheddar. It was fine. I would eat it again, but I wouldn't dream about it.

The next salad I made was more of a hot salad. It had potatoes, green beans, tomatoes, olives and pesto. It wasn't bad. I ate it three times. but I think it was missing something. Maybe cheese? Everything in my life is missing cheese.

Now, let's talk about the salad I loved.

It starts as a plate of greens. Pile on some jasmine rice. Cut up an avocado and throw on top. Then add a shit ton of chives. Oh hello, hard boiled egg. We're almost complete. We just need the dressing made of sesame oil, soy sauce and wasabi. Now you have a salad that people dream of and eat constantly. Fuck, maybe I CAN call this book Salad Love.

Now, I know this a short review, and I have three other books to talk about, but I am vacationing tomorrow so I need to keep this brief.

Have I talked about this book while drunk? NO, what am I? CRAZY? I don't talk about fucking salads when I'm drunk. I talk about real books. And pizza.

Would I recommend this book while drunk? That's a tough question because rarely, when myself or a friend is drunk, do I say, "FUCK YEAH THIS SALAD ROCKS! SPEAKING OF WHICH, HERE'S A BOOK ABOUT SALADS!!!"

I'm sorry, book, by my drunk standards you don't pass. But by my normal, trying to be healthy standards, YOU SOAR!!! SOAR EAGLE SOAR!!!!!

Ooh, and here are some photos of my salads. Don't worry, the first one is that bomb ass salad I have been referring to. The others you don't even need to look at.